Simplifying Your Routine & Managing the Chaos of Back-to-School
Episode 53: Simplifying Your Routine & Managing the Chaos of Back-to-School with Beth Rosenbleeth @dayswithgrey
It’s back-to-school for many of our children and that can come with a lot of big feelings, routine changes, and chaos! In this episode, Rachael chats with Beth, educator and creator of Days with Grey, all about simplifying routines, promoting play-based learning for young children, and how to cope with the change that is “back-to-school” (or just starting school!).
Here’s what they discuss in this episode:
Beth shares her journey from being a teacher to becoming a stay-at-home mom which led to her creating her online platform to teach parents about play, routines and more
The concept of “breakfast invitations” and how they can inspire play and learning in the morning!
Tips for creating morning and afternoon routines and preparing for back-to-school
How to manage the after-school meltdowns
The importance of meeting and understanding each child’s individual needs
How to set boundaries and provide predictability in routines.
And so much more!
Mentioned in this episode:
Beth’s website: https://dayswithgrey.com/
Beth’s Instagram: @dayswithgrey
Soft Skills activity cards: https://shop.dayswithgrey.com/shop/soft-skill-activity-cards/
40 unbeatable toddler activities: https://dayswithgrey.com/top-activities-two-year-olds/
Supply List for Kids: https://dayswithgrey.com/a-simple-list-of-learning-tools-for-kids/
If you enjoyed this episode, please rate 5⭐️ and write us a review! ⬇️
✨For sleep support and resources, visit heysleepybaby.com and follow @heysleepybaby on Instagram! 😴☁️🤎✨
Rachael is a mom of 3, founder of Hey, Sleepy Baby, and the host of this podcast.
Listen to the full episode
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Welcome to No One Told Us, the podcast that tells the truth about parenting and talks about all the stuff you wish you knew before having kids. I'm your host, Rachel, and today I'm speaking with my friend Beth, creator of Days with Grey, who simplifies routines and promotes play -based learning for young children. Beth has a master's in education and 13 years of teaching experience, and now she shares practical activities for early development.
As a mom of three herself, Beth's strategies resonate with her 275 ,000 plus Instagram followers. And you can join her each day to enrich your child's daily adventures through play.
And I'm so excited to have Beth today because she is actually one of the first like mom parenting, whatever types of accounts that I followed back when I first became a mom and I had two little ones, little toddlers and I was looking for things to do with them. She has so many great ideas and I'm just so excited to welcome her to the podcast today. So thanks so much for being here, Beth.
I'm excited too. It's been fun watching. I think you actually gave me a shout out that I saw an influx of new followers from years ago. And you're on my radar and it's been fun watching you grow as well.
Yeah, the Instagram world can be really weird, but sometimes you make great friends and great connections, so it's all good too. So before we kind of dive into questions about activities and learning that we can do with our little ones at home,why did you start this? Why did you kind of leave, you know, education to pursue this more home -based style and this Instagram platform that's become so successful?What was your why for doing that?
Well, it started when I taught for about 13 and a half years and we were moving and I was also pregnant with my second. And many educators know that you're when you have two kids in daycare, you're basically, it evens out. If not puts you lower than. Yeah, they're not making any money. So I decided to stay home, which was a harder decision. I really wasn't sure. But once I made the decision I knew that's exactly what I needed to do. And I was pregnant with my second, my oldest in my middle are a year and a half apart. So I was pregnant and I knew at home, you know, the saying the days are long is true. The days are really long. And I remember looking, you know, Grayson and I were hanging out and this play space and we created downstairs. And it was just kind of like, wait, everyone tells me, like, play, you just know what to do, but we're not, we're not doing it. Like, what, we just feel like we're walking in circles.
And so I, you know, did a combination of things. I, like, put my teacher hat on and then also really dug deep into some play -based learning and how to get early childhood to spark a little bit more creativity and independence. And then I knew that there was a need online that I had some skills and I had some gifts that I could share online. And I thrive on accountability. And so I think being able to put something on the platform and another family saying, oh, my gosh, yes, I need this too. Like kept us both accountable, quote, unquote, right? Like not in a rigid way, but in a way that it was just motivating to be like, wait, but did you try this? Oh, I love this. Oh, this did not work. And it felt less alone. I love that.
Yeah. And that idea of feeling less alone, I think, is also so big and why so many people turn to other moms on social media so that they can feel validated. And we're definitely going to dive into some of your great ideas. And I would love to talk about your famous breakfast invitations and all of that stuff. But before we kind of get into the nitty gritty, what can you tell us about why independent play is so helpful and so important for little kids. And what do you think the biggest barriers are for parents? Because it's such a huge issue on social media. I see people talk about it all the time and talk about how hard it is to get their kids to play independently.
But then there's also lots of people saying that you're going to basically ruin your kids if they can't play independently. So I feel like it's a lot of pressure right now for parents to provide the time and the space and the materials for great, rich, independent play. But it's also a little bit hard in practice, especially for kids who have certain temperaments, right? So I would love for you to speak a little bit about that.
Well, different temperaments is 100 % true. So the first thing I like to share at parents is like the average time to spend like for a child to spend an activity is one plus their age or double their age. And I think knowing that little nugget of information is really helpful for the moments when you're like, wait, why are you not playing more? You know, if a two -year -old is lasting three minutes, four minutes, knowing that that's normal and that there's not something not working is key because then you take a lot of pressure off yourself.
Another thing that I found helpful, I like to think of it, you know, if I wake up and I put my gym clothes on right away, I'm likely to work out. It's like just how I function. And so when I started thinking about my kids, I started thinking about, we used to start with TV, but it wasn't working. Like I felt like we turned it off and then everyone walked in circles. And although it bought me time in the beginning, it didn't feel like we knew what to do afterwards.
So I like to start thinking about play the same way. Like, well, if I, if we start the morning with something play inspired or just a routine that is a little bit more independently directed,
then, you know, well that lead into more motivation to keep going. And then we can have downtime later in the afternoon.
The third thing I always like to share with families is that you can build a luxurious play room in the basement and you can't expect your kids to go play in the basement. Like, they want to be around us. And a lot of times it's just sharing that connection with them that helps them feel heard and seen and, like, wanted and not pushed away, which as a busy parent, it's really hard to do with emails, we're running businesses, we're getting to work, we're, you know, scheduling doctors. And so another Big tip is that wherever you want your play space to be,
if you can keep it on the same level that you are, even if it's, that's really important because a lot of times they just want to be next to us, not so much our playmate.
And when we take the pressure of like being the playmate off again, we enjoy our time together a lot more. So, you know, if I have to work in the office, a lot of times in the early years there was like a kinetic sand bin to the side or you know maybe three options where they can come and they can pull it rather than then asking them to constantly leave.
I love that and yeah we I mean it drives me insane to have our toys and play materials all over our first floor and in our kitchen and in our dining room and in our living room because they have stuff in there in their play room that's upstairs but they never want to play in there unless we're also upstairs. So I've just had to kind of like talk myself off the ledge and understand that this is not forever, that my house will not always look this messy, and it’s actually a good thing if it’s messy and it’s actually a good thing if it’s messy because it means that they’re playing with their toys. Which is what I want and their art materials so I love that.
Yeah, I know it is tricky. And mine are 10,9, and 7 and you know in a funny way i realized we decorated our house 10 years ago when we moved in and so now 10 years later, I'm like, oh my gosh, I just want to redo it all because it has been lived in. You know, it's been played in. It's been lived in still at 10, 9. There are magnetic tiles all over. But at the same time, they're using them and they're building some really cool structures. So it's just a tricky one.
And I think it also goes to, you know, I am a classroom teacher. So I have that in my head. And I know you did special education. So you kind of already have that kind of environment in your brain where if someone's coming from a different kind of environment, that's going to feel differently. Like I can, for me, if the kitchen is clean, that's my home base. I just need, I need no dishes.. I need the kitchen clean. Then you step out of the kitchen and you're like,
whoops, Almost stepped over, you know, something.
But so, so that's like, that's my level. If you know your level, then it's, it's important to stick with that too. I can never tell everybody to be like, no, it's fine if you have stuff everywhere. Because it's not fine for some people. And we all need different things to function. And building that self -awareness of like what you need is extremely important. Like, I even tell parents to think about the times that aren't working for you and build your routine around that because that has been really successful for me in a way that, you know, if I can keep myself going, the kids will follow into that routine.
But if I'm so concerned about, wait, no, they need to do this, and then they're not good at this time, then no one really knows what to do because I feel unsteady and so do they.
That's such a good point. Yeah, our energy. They match our energy every single time, don't they? That's a really, really good tip. So, okay, backing up a little bit, because I do want to get into, you mentioned routines, and lots of people are getting ready to go back to school. Some people are already back at school. It seems so early, but it gets earlier and earlier for some people every year, I guess. So I would love to talk a little bit about routines and your ideas for prepping for back to school. Before we touch on that, and maybe this is part of a back to school routine, I would love for you to go into a little bit more about breakfast invitations because that's something that I have loved. I don't do it consistently, but I love implementing them from time to time. Where did you get the idea for those and what are those? And is it a good thing to implement for before school? Or is it more like summertime or really little kids who aren't yet in school? Who's it best for?
So breakfast invitations started when I was just tired of morning TV. It wasn't working for us. So again, some families, it's working. Don't ever fix something that's working. For me, it was not working. And when I think about where my problem areas are, I'm not a natural morning person. So the fact that like my eyes opened and all of a sudden I had to like put bottles in the warmer and change a diaper and, you know, it was it was a lot for me so I put my teacher hat on and I'm like you know what what if just like putting your gym clothes on in the morning what if the kids came down and on the kitchen table there was a very simple under three minute prep activity that would inspire play and inspire learning and inspire creativity and it just turned into this most magical moment where they would dabble into what's in front of them. Something very simple like color sorting.
So like a very easy one is you just put out some white paper, draw a yellow square, a red square, blue square, gather a few toys that are those colors and you put them down.
Then you go to bed. You wake up, they come down, you can heat your coffee, they start sorting. Well, they may start sorting. They may start stacking. They may start playing with the objects. The idea is that you're planting the seed. So we're not like hovering over them being like, that's not the right color.
That doesn't go there. Like the idea is that you're more like on the other side of the kitchen and you, you know, have your cup of coffee and you're like, oh, looks like there's a lot of red bears in that section. How many do you think there are? And you're casually developing this conversation that are developing learning skills but in a very like low pressure play way and what I found is that since we started the morning together in the same room since they started with manipulatives and hands -on items it usually led right into independent play and they would kind of like have enough of me and then go run off into the playroom and do whatever they wanted to do and that was key. That was a key transition.
And I also think of myself and I crash at three. So I'm like, okay, that's when TV time is. Or, you know, and that time changed so much over the years. Just maybe it was more like 1230 when they were preschool or toddlers. And, but now in the older age, it's 2 o 'clock in the summer or 3 o 'clock or, you know. So that was really helpful because those were my two parts of the day that weren't working for me. And I filled them in with something to kind of trigger a different response.
I love that. And I love this focus too on like, what do I need and what's best for me as the mom? Because the energy of the house totally revolves around how the mom is feeling. Like I fully believe that. I think there's so much martyrdom in motherhood sometimes. And we're like, we have to be, you know, servants to our kids and just do whatever we can to make them happy and make sure they're good. But really, we should be making sure that we're good and we should revolve our routines around what's going to help us be the best, most present parent, right?
So, okay, when we come back, I want to dive into routines and back to school routines. We'll be right back.
Okay. So we were just talking about breakfast invitations, which I absolutely love as a part of the morning routine. And you have so many ideas for them over on your Instagram and on your website. Do you recommend starting with something like that before school or what are your biggest tips for helping us actually get up, get ready for school, get out the door? What are your tips?
Because you have school aged kids now. Mine is, he just finished kindergarten this past year. So we're kind of still in the chaos mode in the morning where it's like three kids, three different schedules, three different drop -offs. What do you find has helped you as a mom of three? Getting three kids ready.
Yeah, getting out the door. So the bus came last year at 650. It comes at seven now. No. Like I, or even like a working parent that needs to get out. I know. Even a parent that needs to get out the door for work. I wouldn't necessarily say a breakfast invitation is the solution to that necessarily because it's so early and you're trying to move along. There's some other tips for that.
But in the early years, if you have more flexibility, like when all three were home and home,
like not, I think maybe, you know, maybe at 9 .30, my oldest went to a five -year -old class, but then we would always do them in the morning because they were up at 7 a .m. But when what I realized in parenting too, like is if I could put 10 minutes in the front end, then it gives me way more time to do the things I have to do on the back end.
So starting a morning with like a breakfast invitation or reading a book or playing a game or whatever your child chooses really kind of sets them up for feeling like they've connected and then they're more apt to being independent for the longer time rather than starting the morning where you're like, no, no, no, I can't. No, no, I can't. Then they're like, you know, they're, they're relentless. And so I really like starting a breakfast invitation with a family that has a little bit more flexibility that maybe they're not getting out the door at all or maybe they're getting out more around like 9, 930.
There's absolutely no way we have time for anything else right now in this current stage. But the other thing too is like parents, you know, you use it.
No, I mean, my jaw is still on the floor about 650 pick up. Like I'm I'm a morning person and my kids are up early and that still would be very hard for us. That's, that's a lot.
It is a lot. So I do have some tips like that I will share with you too that have helped us, you know, just you learn so much over the years how to get out that quickly. And that is something that I have shared, ready to share with you and your followers as well. Because gosh, it's so early. And my oldest especially, he's in fifth grade. I mean, he, in his mind, he has it narrowed down to like the very last minute he needs to get out the door and wake up and that's a 10 minute window. But in his mind, that's all the time he needs and he's narrowed it down.
So, you know, you do have to kind of think ahead on a lot of things where if you're like, okay, well, if you're going to sleep, 10 minutes for the bus comes, how do you have everything already ready? Right.
Okay. So what can you share with us about some routines that have worked for you for getting your kids up and out the door without everyone screaming at each other and leaving mad.
Yeah. Well, and I will say, too, we're on day four. So we're still going strong, but, you know, talk to me in four months.
I'm a huge list person for children. And, you know, whether they're older and you're like, what do you think you need? Go on Canva and make yourself a list or they're a little bit younger and you're like, I made this list or let's make this list together. Regardless of what stage a child is in, it takes the constant nagging, repeating myself over and over again, because i can just be like you know it is in the list. Just do the list and the list is done.
So I have this list, I'm trying to make this an editable, um, canva template for families. But like the night before, before we do the dessert. So I'm like before we go into dessert mode, these things all need to be in a pile. And for him, it's like his epi, his backpack, snack, sneaker, socks, water bottle.. And they just like put it on a, on the floor in a pile. We don't have the we don't have a space for like a drop zone or like a locker system we don't have that our house is four small rooms there's no place for that so it has to be just like on the kitchen floor.
And then my middle you know he has like a very similar one with just exactly what he needs he might need something a little different and every night they just have to go through
the list and they are not approved to the next stage until they have everything in that pile. And that has helped tremendously because there's no like where's my sock. Oh, you need socks. Go upstairs. See if you can find them. There's no, you know, it's just, it's just there.
And then same like I think it's really helpful to have a toothbrush on the level you eat in. If you have a bathroom, which you probably do. Yeah, you're shaking your head. Yeah, because it's just like, you know, kind of condensing it all to get out the house on time is really, really helpful.
Yes, that is such a good tip. And I love, even for little ones, like I recommend visuals and lists and visual schedules and stuff like that for even little toddlers. It helps so much when they can see it visually. And it gives them a little bit of independence when it's like, this is my list. I'm in charge. I can do this by myself. I don't need someone telling me what to do every step of the way. It's really nice for building those executive functioning skills, too.
And then the toothbrush thing is so funny that you mentioned that because we actually didn't have a bathroom on our first floor when we moved in. We only had one bathroom in our house and it was upstairs by the bedrooms. And we renovated last year. And one thing that I was like, we have to include at least just a half bath because I can't have three kids that are potty training ages going up and down the stairs 25 ,000 times a day.
So we did put in a little half bath. And now it's perfect because it's right off the kitchen. And so we have, you know, a little tooth brushing station in there. And then it's also where I do my daughter's hair. So we have all of our hair stuff in the kitchen, which seems weird. But it just makes the morning go so much quicker when we're not going up and down the stairs and looking for things and all the different bedrooms. And yeah, whatever you can do to like streamline that morning and just have everything where you need it helps so much.So I love those tips. We're going to take one more quick break. And then when we get back, I actually want to talk about afterschool routines because those can be a little bit tricky too. We'll be right back.
Okay. So You gave us some great tips, Beth, about getting ready in the morning and, you know, the school rush with kids. But one thing that I think a lot of parents also struggle with is after school, especially if you're picking up from daycare, picking up from school, you're working, it's late. Everybody's tired. You really just need to get home and, like, get them fed and get the bedtime routine going. It can be a really chaotic time of day for families, especially with multiple kids. What are some things that you've done that have worked for your family or what are some tips that you have for parents who are trying to get that late afternoon, early evening schedule to feel less chaotic?
Yeah. And I love that you mentioned there's so many different schedules because there truly are. And I think that there's different strategies for different groups because I'm in that I can be home around the time that they're getting off the bus. And so that gives me a little bit more of an opportunity to set up another, again, like a checklist, right? And I wanted to show this one too because we just did a handheld one for a long time.
But, you know, thinking about what are your top three, like maybe start with three, or what are your top five, like that you just need done because you know your child and you know if it lingers, it just might not ever get run. So like for us, it's like wash your hands. Put your lunchbox in the sink. I fill the water in the sink with a little soapy water so that they can take care of that on their own, wash it. You know, maybe use the bathroom. I read a lot of books about how boys will just not really use the bathroom at school. So that's like one of my focuses after school before you go play.
A hearty snack, knowing your kids' lunchtime is really key because school lunch rotations have to start around 10 .30. And so, you know, when your child comes home, regardless of the age, usually they crash and they crumble. And so, you know, getting over that hump, like they walk in the door, regardless of what time, I feel like they walk in the door and there's this like 10 -minute transition, that could be longer, but like at least 10 minutes where I just kind of like hold my breath and try to like, yeah, that's a great idea. Like, you know, good job. I'm just trying to be like trying to get them to switch gears because they're hungry.
So knowing like what time they have lunch is key because if your child had lunch at 11 and then they had goldfish for their snack at 1 .30 or a bag of popcorn, like, they're really not, they're coming in hot. And as a teacher, like, even at 4 o 'clock, I mean, I just wanted like a giant veggie burger. Like, I just wanted to eat like a big meal. And so I kind of related to that. So I think feeding them something hearty is a really important step, no matter when they get home, especially if they're in aftercare, they probably are snacking on the more like cracker, goldfish, pretzels type of snacks. And that's pretty key.
So adjusting the dinner time, which I know is really hard as you're coming home from work, but, you know, crock pot ideas and stuff like that are really helpful so that everybody can just like pretty much wash their hands and eat.
Yeah, I've actually been seeing, maybe it was from you, but I've been seeing a few people on Instagram recently talking about having like a 4 p .m. dinner or 5 p .m. dinner, which feels so early. But you're right, like they are starving when they get home. And then you could always do like a hearty bedtime snack, like closer to their bedtime, like a banana with peanut butter or, you know, something like that so that they're not going to bed hungry, but they've already had that like nice nourishing meal when they get home instead of filling up on like empty calorie snacks because my kids come home and they are absolutely ravenous like they demand snacks they'll like move stools to climb into the snack cabinet like they're just like little animals so yeah food is always key and for me too like if I'm hungry I'm so much more likely to be snippy and and to lose my patience with them so Feeding ourselves is important for everyone.
What about like after school play or after school TV? What do you think about, you know, kind of the benefits or drawbacks to having a certain activity that your kids are doing after school?
Yeah, and this is another one that opens up so many different options. Really knowing your child best is what I think is the number one key and what truly regulates your child. So if I talk about one of my children in particular, he would love to come home and just veg out on the couch. That would be his number one. But as a parent, I know that he is somebody who needs to do a lot of that like heavy work with his body to kind of regulate his emotions.
And if I offer the just go lay down and watch TV, then he's not going to get that. And like after he turns it off, it's just going to be more disastrous. So I think I'm really understanding, I don't think there's anything wrong. Like if your child really does well with a downtime show, you know, when we finished preschool, when we had younger ones and they came home from preschool, he could watch a show or two after preschool.
So it really just depends on your child. So now in the older age, they're 9, 7 and 10, 9, and 7, and they come home and they have to do their things. They have to wash your hands, lunch, box, bathroom, snack, homework. And then they just go play. And it's really important for me and knowing their personalities that they do go off and play.
My two oldest will go outside and play with friends. But my youngest, he is so funny. He's in first grade. He comes home, he just takes off his clothes and he just like puts his Yoto mini on. I know you're a Yoto fan as well. And just like eats his little snack and, and you know, I've been hearing him in his room and he's like, do, do, do, do, yeah, do, too, you know, like just, he just needs to go in his own world. So they all have different, different ways that they need to kind of like re -regulate their systems.
Yeah, that regulation piece is huge.And what was so interesting when you were talking, I think also for parents to just be aware of the activities that their kids are doing at school too. Like when your son was at preschool, he was probably getting tons of play, tons of that heavy work. And so he was getting those needs met at school. But then as they get older, there's less of that, right? They're sitting. They're having to really hold it together. And so they do need maybe more of those sensory regulation and play opportunities when they're home when they're not at school, even though it's tempting to throw them in front of the TV, right?
You make such a good point, and that is one of the reasons why I try to transition them into a little bit more play is because the older, it's different for every school, but I feel like in the older years, they're on the, I mean, kindergarteners, just everyone's on iPads and computers, and I think more and more and more in the school setting- they are like the kid my can when I taught kindergarten we had time for centers at the end of the day where the kids picked a center and they played they don't do that anymore and you know even if I am observing at the kindergarten class and I see this big bucket of blocks they don't even really bring them out.
Um they're really just taking up space which is really unfortunate but um they get this little window to go outside and play and there's there's this um There's this educator called Teacher Tom, and he said something that I find so helpful.
And it's like the rule of 15. So it takes 15 minutes for a kid to like enter play. It takes 15 minutes for them to work out the kinks. Like that's when the arguments are happening. No, your tag, no, you're it. No, we're going to play with swords. No, we're going to play with this. And then there's like 15 minutes for magic. And his statement is pushing more time for kids at any age to play because it takes that long to actually get to the part that counts. You know you have all the kinks in the beginning, so I keep that a lot in the back of my mind, and I think really making sure that you have some time that is unstructured is very difficult in the older years, especially kids are getting better at a sport. They're getting better in an activity. And, you know, we're putting them in things.
But we need to maybe pick one day, two days, three days a week, whatever your schedule allows that you can, you can commit to, I'm not going to tell you what to play. I'm not going to not going to tell you what to do. I'm just going to tell you that it's a screen free time. It's just time. You can go read. You can do whatever you want. But you have to decide because having the ability to make that decision for yourself, like, huh, like I don't know what to do with myself. And then finding some sort of avenue or outlet is just such a critical life skill that I want to really kind of put in a little bit of a bubble.
I love that. And that 15 rule is so applicable to even little kids because I feel like sometimes parents will tell me like, my kid won't play by themselves. They need me with them all the time. And part of me wants to be like, just push through. Like just let them be bored. Let them figure it out. Say no, hold the boundary and see what happens. I think we're wanting to rescue our kids from boredom too much or we're saying, okay, fine, I'll play with you. We're okay, fine, I'll turn the TV on because we don't want to hear the whining or we don't want to see that difficult process that it is sometimes for them to get into play and to figure something out, but leaving space for that. I think in the day and in the week as they get older is so super important.
Well, and I think that's where the predictable routine comes in. And like when you have the,
you know, you're using TV or screens or whatever you want to do as a tool, we watch plenty of stuff. My kids are really into Nintendo, but holding that boundary when they get off the bus and they're like, we just, we just today just play Nintendo. I have nothing wrong against Nintendo, to be clear. But they know that they can watch it on Friday after school. So it's like this big to -do. They call it Nintendo Friday. Their kids come up, their friends come over. You know, it's just what we chose to do. And I think that from the very early ages up until now, if you can set aside like predictable routine, so it's like, well, this is the time that we turn it on. This is when we do this. It helps take away from all the asking to do it at the irregular times because they already know the system.
And so they're still maybe going to ask, but they're going to like, it's just going to take one reminder because they already know. They're just asking just to see if like maybe you'll change your mind. But again, there's nothing wrong with TV or screens. If that's what works for your family and you're like, well, it actually is working again don't fix it if it's working um or don't change it if it's working but but having the in the early years the predictable routine is so key because i see it now in the older ages that the rhythm is is somewhat already there so it doesn't take as long when they are bored.
Yeah for sure.
Okay so my last question for you before we wrap up, is what is something that no one told you before you became a parent that you wish you had known or have been prepared for?
This is a good one. I don't know. I need to think about this because it's like every hour you think of something different. And so I have to think of like where my head is right now.
What it is today. Yeah, what it is today. Gosh, there's just so many. I don't know if it's what somebody didn't tell me, but I think the most important part about raising kids,
especially as they go through the adolescence, is that other people's opinions about your child don't need to become your own. And no one really talks about that.
But I think it's really important as your kids grow in the elementary years. They're not always going to make the best decisions and that's also part of like what's going to help them grow and learn and you know when they make mistakes or when they you know maybe treat a friend unkindly or you know don't pick up something super fast like somebody else might expect them to do or want them to do I just think it's important to remember in the end of the day like other people's opinions don't have to change your opinion of your child, Like, you know your kids are good kids and remembering that as things get really hard is what's really helpful for me right now, knowing that they are great kids.
I absolutely love that. And all our kids need, right, is for that one person, like us or their other parent, all they need is one person to think that they are just the absolute best thing in the world. And that is one of the biggest predictors of their future success and happiness. So I love that. Thank you so much for all of your wonderful tips and advice. It's so helpful. I always love hearing from moms who are like just a couple steps ahead of me, right, with like kids that are just a little bit older. They've been through everything I've been through. And I think it's just so helpful. Like even for new moms listening that have a tiny little baby and they're not thinking about this stuff yet, I think it's just so nice to see that like you will get out of this really hard stage.
And like, there are so many things to look forward to. So I just, I love hearing from moms that have older kids. Where can people find you? And what are some of the resources that you can offer to parents? I know you have the soft skill cards. Do you want to talk about that for a second?
Sure. Yeah. So the soft skill cards were created for executive functioning. And when we were talking about predictable or making a preschooler a preschooler or toddler list, there's one in there that uses magnetic tiles. And I like to talk about how you're only going to pick three for younger ones, right? You're not going to bombard them with a giant list. But you can put on the magnetic tiles a sticky note with three different things. Brush your teeth, get dressed, I don't know, eat breakfast. And then letting them kind of manipulate the magnetic tiles and putting it in the order that they want to do it.
So from the very start, they're taking control of making those decisions because control is huge. So the soft skill cards have activities along those lines that are somewhat social,
emotional learning, but a lot of executive functioning, which I laugh about because people ask me the ages. And I'm like, what, 44?
I still have to remind myself strategies from the cards. So really all ages.
Okay I love that so people can find that right on your website or right through your instagram so days with gray .com so it's g -re -y his name is Grey so he's it's days with grey and it's dot com or it's at days with gray on instagram or Facebook and I answer all my DMs I can answer email so send me an email and I'm more than happy I'll reply back
You're amazing. And I absolutely love that magnetic tile idea for a visual schedule because they can manipulate it. They can like stick it on the fridge. That's genius. I've never seen that before. Thanks, Beth, so, so much. I'll link everything for everybody in the show notes so that it's easy for people to grab.
Thank you so much. I hope you have a great start to the school year. And I really appreciate you for being here.
Thank you.
